I'm not sure what I want.
So many options and a million more decisions to be made.
Take a left near that mail box? or follow the road to the dead end you know is coming?
I've taken the dead end and usually found myself stumbling into an endless field.
It's always empty. It lacks a solution. I knew it was coming, but I figured by the time I reached it,
a road would be paved, or maybe a path would be forged. I thought maybe the field would be full of life, and exuberance. I reasoned that no one took the time to carefully examine the field. I was going to dive under the surface. I searched high and low. I ran through a patch of thorns, but I didn't mind. I kept looking. I was so determined to find the best in it. There had to be something more. Nothing could be as heartless as everyone declared it was. After too long, I became aware that it was getting dark. I had to give up. I had too many scrapes I knew would scar. It was a lost cause. I decided to leave.
I still think about it. I wish I would have found something. I consider returning, to search again, but the potential scars are not worth it.







[a friend you knew would hurt you, but you tried anyway. scott shortino.]